We are in the process of a miscarriage and I wonder, is this the worst part of it? Waiting to pass a dead child, old enough to have had a heartbeat but far too young to survive ex-utero, or was it sitting in the doctor’s office, holding my wife’s hand as our hearts are broken — again?

Maybe the worst part comes later, after the physical is over, and we’re just… sad.

There isn’t another good word. There’s no upside to this. There’s no, “they’re in a better place,” or “it was time,” or “they aren’t suffering any more.” 

In the meantime, it’s just heightened anxiety, hoping we don’t end up in the ER again like we did on Mother’s Day.

No, there isn’t really a worst, it’s just all bad.